It’s true: I’m the worst mother in the world.
While all the cool kids are wearing fancy label clothes and shopping unsupervised with their friends, our poor children are at home wearing hand me downs playing with each other and if they want to go shopping it will be with a chaperone. We don’t give our children an allowance for doing nothing, if they want money then they have to busk to you know – learn how to work like the grown ups? They’re even taught how to take something they love and turn it in to a business. Isn’t that awful!
Our children aren’t even allowed their own laptops or devices, instead they have to use a shared family laptop to do things like their school work, but that gets put away when they’re done and sadly, they’re not allowed to spend all their time googling Kardashians or downloading the latest mp3’s so they can stay in their own little world and listen to music all day… No, interaction and the building of social skills is a requirement in our home and we have an expectation that they learn how to communicate and get along. Tough huh? And when they start arguing about who gets to play mine craft on the iPad you guessed it, the iPad is removed and nobody gets to play.
It must be torturous living in our home…
We have rules, but the children helped to construct those rules. They also chose the consequences and since that awareness of boundaries has been set I can tell you that only once have apology “i love you because…” letters have been written.
Ours is not a home where the kids rule the roost, and the kids do not come before my spouse and vice versa. Why? Because our children need to see their parents work together and because it works for us. We run our home as a team the way that we think is best because that is what works for us. And whatever that means is not the business of critics or famous do-gooders who like to satellite-parent our children through the use of the media. In fact, media in any way shape or form is monitored closely by myself and my husband because we do not want our children to learn things like the Anaconda Dance when we’re not looking, or how shooting up your school glorifies you and makes you an overnight celebrity. We choose the values our family upholds, not society.
I’m sure that just like you, we care about our children: we want them to be level headed communicators who can accept constructive criticisms gracefully and whose behavior isn’t affected by what is deemed “socially acceptable”. We want for them to be kind, respectful and well mannered, strong, and loving. We want them to be the kinds of people who can apologize, show empathy and admit when they are wrong. But most of all, we want our children to grow up to have the stomach to be true to themselves and the divine nature that is within them, not what the world tells them they should be.
Sadly, our children will have to continue to struggle laughing and playing with each other. It will be tough but we will try not to force them to build loving relationships and skills that will see them through to well beyond their adult years.
Perhaps they may even turn out to be happy. Oh no, how frightful would that be?
Realistically though I love my children and regardless of how awkward they might feel I tell them as often as I can. If the world says I am an awful mother because I give half a damn about my children enough to provide for them a safe and secure home with boundaries and routine where they can bloom and grow, then the world can take a giant leap.